For those of you (mostly queers I imagine) who have seen If These Walls Could Talk 2, you may recall the final short starring Sharon Stone and Ellen DeGeneres as a lesbian couple trying to have a baby. My favorite scene is towards the end when the couple finally purchases the sperm they plan to use for insemination. Ellen’s character comes rushing home with it in a giant metal canister and Sharon’s character meets her at the door wearing boxers,…
When Mrs S and I began seriously discussing creating a family together, we knew we wanted to have our own biological children. We each hoped to carry a child because we both wanted to experience pregnancy. Since Mrs. S is older, she was first in line for pregnancy. This was just fine with me because at the time, I wan’t quite ready for an alien invader in my uterus. Once we started talking in earnest about choosing a donor, I started to feel really really sad. It hit…
As you may have gleaned by now, I have been struggling with motherhood. I know this comes up for many folks, particularly in the first six months, as everyone (including baby) adjusts to the new family order. To acknowledge the obvious: parenting is hard, people. See image below, this is what it feels like most of the time. It’s way harder than I ever imagined, but I think that’s because I was imagining the wrong things. Describing the challenges of parenting to expectant…
I cried several times last week. I admitted this to my mom’s “support group” but rather than affirming my experience (as I was expecting) I heard crickets. I thought being a mom meant we all had a hard time and then talked about it. I can’t be the only mom who cries sometimes…right? On Wednesday I made it to mama and baby yoga (win!). The class was lovely and I felt calm and grounded despite a mid-class tantrum from The Beast. Afterwards, a few moms…
When my wife and I embarked on the quest to bring a child into this world, we intended to do so with open eyes. We wanted to grow our family in a way that was stable and balanced, full of love and joy. We read all of the books and had all of the conversations. And yet, we still felt like there wasn’t enough information out there specifically about the queer experience of having kids, so I decided to start this…