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Author: Mrs T

Your child will not grow up to be a sociopath…

Your child will not grow up to be a sociopath…

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I was at the playground about 9 months ago when I witnessed a two year old stomping on another child’s hand as they both scaled the stairs to a slide.  While comforting her daughter, the victim’s mother turned to her friend with a hint of amusement in her voice and said, “Oh, toddler abuse.”  This woman’s response stuck with me as a grounded attitude towards playground chaos.  She seemed unsurprised by the interaction and generally unconcerned that it would permanently…

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Non-birth mom with all of the feelings.

Non-birth mom with all of the feelings.

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I have been sitting on this blog post for a long time, unsure of how to start it.  As you well know, I have a toddler on my hands.  One who, from my perspective anyway, is very intelligent and therefore capable of sophisticated psychological warfare.  Couple this with some ripe insecurities about my status as “non-birth mom” and you’ve god a recipe for a mommy feeling all the feelings.  Just recently my child seemed to be experimenting with differentiating by…

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Potty training is terrible. My wife is amazing.

Potty training is terrible. My wife is amazing.

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Hi! I haven’t written a thing for six months, oops.  I owe my silence to a particularly busy spring and summer which included a family trip to New Zealand, a solo yoga retreat, training for and running a marathon, completing a big curriculum project for work, not to mention various weekend adventures to hot springs, the beach, camping with queers(!) and lots of time laying by the pool.  Here are a few snaps of our adventures.   So what’s up on the…

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skeptic
Successful Mothering. Oxymoron?

Successful Mothering. Oxymoron?

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I have been a stay at home mom now for a year. I struggle with the term because of all the baggage that it carries (for me). I picture one of these two scenarios… Either you’re totally disheveled, overweight, un-showered, unhappy, and late to everything, or you look fabulous every day with a perfect body, impeccable clothing, hair and makeup, your kids are clean and well-behaved, basically life is effortlessly beautiful. 90% of the time I feel like the former,…

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The only lesbian in the room

The only lesbian in the room

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I studied a concept in grad school called racial stress, which is a term to describe discomfort or stress related to interactions that involve race.  It can affect anyone but is particularly detrimental for folks on the receiving end of a racist interaction. Research has shown that it can negatively affect mental and emotional health.  If you’re interested, check out this great article that was published in The Atlantic a few years ago.  This clearly isn’t a blog about race…

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When one of her first words is tofu…

When one of her first words is tofu…

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I love food. I love cooking for my family and friends. I love talking about it, reading about it and writing about it. I love Indian food, deep dish pizza, long dinners at Michelin star restaurants and everything in between. Of course it is not sustainable to eat at French Laundry every day (tragic) so for me, the next best thing is preparing and eating (mostly) healthful, seasonal food.  I focus my cooking on a plant-based diet, avoiding red meat…

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Surviving the First Year

Surviving the First Year

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Alright so I haven’t written a post in 3 months. A lot changes in three months when you have a baby under 1, like your kid goes from not talking to talking. Not posting for three months also means that I haven’t shared with you the latest about her development, or my suffering and joy with respect to it. I tell myself that I haven’t written because there was so much going on in my life (which there was) but…

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Happy Pride!

Happy Pride!

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I regret that it has been over a month since my last post. Life has been crazy over here for the girl tribe.  Mrs S has been working like a madwoman (and when she works nights and weekends, it means I don’t get a break either).  We also just returned from a family trip to New York and Philly to visit old friends, see new art, and eat real bagels.                Amidst the insanity,…

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Surrendering to the fertility gods

Surrendering to the fertility gods

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For those of you (mostly queers I imagine) who have seen If These Walls Could Talk 2, you may recall the final short starring Sharon Stone and Ellen DeGeneres as a lesbian couple trying to have a baby. My favorite scene is towards the end when the couple finally purchases the sperm they plan to use for insemination. Ellen’s character comes rushing home with it in a giant metal canister and Sharon’s character meets her at the door wearing boxers,…

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A “Good Enough” Donor

A “Good Enough” Donor

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When Mrs S and I began seriously discussing creating a family together, we knew we wanted to have our own biological children.  We each hoped to carry a child because we both wanted to experience pregnancy.  Since Mrs. S is older, she was first in line for pregnancy.  This was just fine with me because at the time, I wan’t quite ready for an alien invader in my uterus.   Once we started talking in earnest about choosing a donor, I started to feel really really sad.  It hit…

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